Yeah i'm going update soon

Don't know why i've been gone so long. I literally have had tons of time but really not much to say, or it just wouldn't manifest itself into what I wanted it to be. But I need to get back into the groove of blogging. So expect something this weekend. Toodles.

Side Eye: Pediphemales

I know. Where the hell have I been? I've been around lazy as hell dealing with some crap and working on a side eye to bring you folks then got distracted. But I had to come out of hiding for this one because I'm tired of this double standard even though it a plus for my people.

There is nothing okay with a grown woman fucking a child. Period. I have no idea why these chicks get a slap on the wrist 90% of the time but it is just sickening. I could care less about how crappy you feel about your wrinkles and your tired ass husband doesn't want to screw your baggy ass anymore and little Tommy said you were pretty and you felt compelled to give him a hummer. NOT COOL. People don't think that crap is all high fives and chest bumps when it's a young girl and a middle aged man now do they?

Now I know this chick is technically only two years older than this boy, but look at him. This kid looks no older than 8 years old, shit is creepy. And now they have a baby. Just disturbing on way too many levels...I wonder if this boy is even 13 like they're reporting.

Side Eye: Myspace

Back when I was 20 or 21 I was in LOVE with myspace. Adorning my profile with videos, all my sexy angle shots with my awesome rockin' tits, the bajillion friends, leaving stupid comments. Yes that was a fun year or whatever. But somewhere along the way I got really tired of the same creepy guys adding me to see my photos and that oh so classic first line "What's good wit you ma?", come to think of it, I am being kind even paraphrasing with correct punctuation. The end all happened when my ex boyfriend started tracking all my activity within myspace and posting stupid bulletins and blogs about me I decided to log off and stay off.

The only reason I even kept my profile is because I like the idea of old friends from school and my family having a way to contact me. I was logging on maybe once every 3 months to check messages and crap. Over the weekend I decided I would start logging on to myspace again since I had my cousins and friends pressuring me to do so. That was friday/saturday-ish.

It is Monday. And I swear it didn't even take me a week to figure out why I had left. Classic bullshit like this:tHatT bUlLsHyt l00Ks fUcKiN dUmB. I don't care what anyone says anyone that takes the time out of their life to purposely type in that fashion should get poked in the eye with a pencil dripping with tabasco. Seriously, it grinds my gears. There is nothing cute about illeteracy.

Now I have about 40 friends on Myspace. And I know almost all of them personally. I try to give people that message me out of nowhere the benefit of the doubt that they aren't creepy panty sniffers but i'm losing hope:

really dude? I ask how you are and you ask me if I am looking to screw you or I assume be in an exclusive fuck buddy relationship with you. Insert Blank Stare Here. Really? Like seriously? Sigh. But it only gets better.

SIDE EYE

I'm so done.

Snow Day

It's about damn time. We have had snow in the forecast since Saturday and i've been waiting to slide on down the hills with Side Eye Jr. It has been snowing since 1am off and on and I couldn't be happier. I lived in California until I was 13 years old. As I child I always wished for snow. I thought it was the most precious substance that God could provide a bored child. About two months after we moved to Oklahoma I saw snow for the very first time in my life. It was a November morning and I opened up the door to walk to school and saw beautiful white powder everywhere. And I love my ever loving mind. I rolled around, made snow men, threw snow balls, it was fantastic.

Me and the kid had tons of fun. Once our tattered cardboard boxes were ripped to shreds we packed it back to the house. I'm offically snowed in and loving it. Though i'm almost out of eggs, lol.

The Devil's Playground

So I decided to take Side Eye Jr. to Chuck E. Cheese this saturday so she could play with the mass of children she is used to. Daycare has been closed all week and I can tell she is tired of hanging out with me. That woman in the back was weird. When we were in line waiting to buy our lunch and tokens she kept saying "Why is it this crowded on a Saturday?" and "Why do they only have teenagers working here?" then after we sat down she kept complaining about the number of children that wouldn't calm down. Hence the look on my kid's face.

The one thing that I always notice about Chuck E. Cheese is how often there are women there dressed like they are auditioning to be on some random 'love' VH1 show looking for a man in the only place where a kid can be a kid. I saw more stretch marks, clevage, and c-section scars then I have seen at the bar. Looking for your future baby daddy at your nephews birthday party: Ultimate Fail.

So i'm not the only one....

Sigh, so earlier this morning Fema told me that Jizz In My Pants has been yanked from youtube. At that moment there was an icebox where my heart used to be. A feeling of numbness settled over my soul knowing that I wouldn't hear the familiar tune and see those funny fuck faces. So I did what usually cheers me up, I watched dope fiends on television!

I can't tell you exactly how long i've been watching Intervention but I can honestly tell you something. My name is Vick and i'm addicted to this show. I've dealt with addiction in my family for many many years so I have never had the desire to do drugs. Sure i've had the occasional blunt and a drink here or there but I have never been interested in anything outside of that. This show along with New Jack City have kept me drug free practically my entire life!

The one thing I really love about the show is how un-edited it is. If you are gonna fight your butt naked sister while she is under the influence of meth then by all means A&E isn't going to edit it out. You get to see how crazy and disgusting addictions can be. Some of the addictions I have seen on the show (self mutilation, OCD, bulimia) really opened my eyes and shattered all the perceptions of what I thought they were. And at the end of the intervention it is never guarunteed that the person is going to get better.

So, if you're never watched, I encourage you to do so. I always feel better and lucky I don't suffer from addiction. For whatever twisted reason it's always an instant pick me up. And to put the cherry on top of all that raw emotion I have found my shower dancing twin:



Now I thought I was the only one that did this! I have the little non-slip things in my bathtub so that I don't hurt myself but this boy has me beat. And be sure to watch to the very end when you see his mother hand him a towel. Why must I cry?

Jizz In My Pants

I think the funniest thing to me about this video is the fact that this has happened to me before. Not the part about jizzing in my pants but a guy I was with jizzed in his pants. We were kissing and all I did was put my hand on his knee and he JIZZED IN HIS PANTS. The look on his face was priceless and so was my laughter. With all that booty tootin' and dry humping in the clubs this must be a sight to see...